Inside me there’s a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Mom and Pop were just a couple of kids when they got married. He was eighteen, she was sixteen and I was three.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Girls are like pianos. When they’re not upright, they’re grand.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix
Those jeans are comfortable, and for those of you who want your president to look great in his tight jeans, I’m sorry I’m not the guy. It just doesn’t fit me. I’m not 20.Help us to share this great article. Your friends will appreciate it! 0share Facebook0 Twitter0 Pinterest0 LinkedIn0 Flipboard Tumblr0 Mix